here's... anything i want actually!

#024 jake's june japanese journal ! ! [31/05/2024 23:49]

for the month of june, i hereby declare to finally begin serious learning of the japanese language, and HERE'S how i'm going to do it!

since 6th class, i have been "learning" japanese, which means i learned how to read hiragana and katakana, and can remember most of the still, i never learned how to write them so woof i guess.

to continue my linguistics journey and try be a cool cool polyglot, i will actually try learning grammar and understanding the language now.

here's what i want to learn:
- sentence structure
- basic phrases
- pronouns
- talking about myself
- colours
- video game terms
- game dev terms (programming)
- music terms (playing & listening, not really theory lol)

i'll be using a "15 minute japanese" book daily, and looking up terms for dictionary purposes! i used to use duolingo but it was only useful for learning the characters, even then just use a sporcle quiz lol.

i am also turning this into an accountability pact thing where i get friends to also practice / make something everyday so we're all do something!

#023 BIP-boy [24/05/2024 20:23]

first of all, i turned 20 2 days ago! second, i am making a Unity game prototype, as i'm entering a gamedev competition in Poland!

in this blog, i just wanted to go through all of the steps of the process, as i haven't used Unity in a couple of months (more of a Godot guy i guess :^])

git repository: first i made the repo on my github.

unity project: chose 2D template for the game.

asset adding: added 2D Capsule shape, coloured it green. added sideways diamond, coloured it grey (for the floor).

goal: simple player movement and implemented with new Unity Input System, while using good practices on github (gitmoji, github issues etc.).

code: did it! using VSC.

#022 collatzeral damage... [20/05/2024 23:06]

today i have finished my second year of college! (out of 4)

my calculus module is the only thing i might've failed... which is good because it means i'll be forced to get better at calculus again soon enough :D!

over the past few days i've been getting more into maths anyways (which i'm thankful for!), and i've been watching lots more general maths content, even contemplating getting a €300 calculus book...

anyways, i found out about this "conjecture" called the collatz conjecture, and i've been trying to make a C program to simulate it and let you play around with it: [here's the github repo]

i will probably make a python/javascript version for the sake of people actually trying it out lol, until then, check out the video and learn some cool stuff! vectors and matrices are also very important for games physics!

#021 ¡leyendo más! [04/05/2024 00:19]

may the 4th be with you! today's actually my parent's wedding anniversary too! how exciting for a star wars fan, or comic fans if you like free comic day, wow this day is a lot of things.

aún así, about 2 years ago i got a kindle for my birthday from my aunt & uncle, and it's been GREAT for my reading, considering i barely read before!

i've actually finished a book, the tetris effect [dan ackerman] which was more a story of the business side of tetris, rather than the code side i was expecting (still good though!).

now i'm reading john romero's biography and a book on gamification / motivation called reality is broken [jane mcgonigal], very interesting so far! a great reccomendation from my UX lecturer.

and my kindle has a cute green case, so it's fun to show off :)💚.

#020 human factors [19/04/2024 21:54]

i just finished the last of my 4 playtests with real people, my classmate eoin, my mam, brother, and finally, dad. all for my 2d game robotation (the tests are for a UX Design class assignment, but i will actually use the research!)

i finished with my dad and it left me with a sober feeling, because in my questions after the initial playtest, which he was very confused in and showed he couldn't control a mouse very well (clicking outside of the window many times accidentally, like it was a cs:go ak47 spray pattern), by the end he was still very lost about what to do in the game, i asked him what the tutorial text / message at the start meant to him, since i had heard him read it out completely, then not really absorb the information.

when i pushed for any feedback on the game, i asked him why he was so confused about what the game wanted him to do, he said the message should have simpler language, this is when i asked him a question and learned that my dad doesn't know the word "toggle".

this was a weird trigger for my emotions, i was surprised and felt some weird open feeling in my chest (still do writing this), and i'm not sure what it is.

i am stating very clearly right now that I AM NOT ASHAMED OF HIM, this is not shaming and i am not saying he needs to know what "toggle" means, he is my dad, he's been there my whole life and i have always wanted, and loved my dad, he is good.

it's just been getting me, to think about what my parent's've done, and what they do to give me what i've WANTED. i've gotten a lot of material things i've wanted over my past 20 years, and i'm grateful for it all (i think? not sure if feeling grateful and showing gratefulness is equal) because it has put me exactly where i am now, and right now is good, i've been very privileged my whole life and my parents have worked very hard in their parenting to get me the resources needed to cultivate my interests and let me be a creative, who's got a lot of potential to do great, large things (but still prefers many tiny things!).

this then led to me thinking about how my dad would've had a way worse education than what i've gotten, asides from the fact that he didn't get his leaving cert / graduate secondary, he's still gone on to make money and build a career, the things he's good at and knows about, i know little about. however, he has been needing to learn how to use the new technology that his sectors have been adopting: online shopping and ordering services mostly.

on that point, it brings me to the idea that a lot of humans have their skill-ceilings maxed out to whatever they grew up with, more simply: people don't progress past their early-life skills, people who used CRTs can't use HDTVs, it's common to see the new ipad kids that can't use desktops and laptops, even though they've been using ipads their whole life! i for one have always been considered the games guy and tech guy, especially local to my family, but when it comes to VR, my brother will be the guy for that because he's on his meta quest 3 (r.i.p oculus) now, giving the quest 2 to me so i can use VR. but i've had it for 4 months and haven't touched it once!

this is to say, it's fine my dad can't really use a mouse even though he's had a netbook before. it's fine that i'll probably always be awkward in VR even if it's in my field.

there's a lot of things that people CAN do, but you pick and choose as you go, and you don't know what you don't know yet.

who really needs to know what "toggle" means anyways?

#019 ¡we're going 4d! [02/03/2024 14:15]

i have recently switched to the spanish layout on my laptop, this is because i want to type ñ, Ñ, ¡, ¿ and apparently ç and Ç with ease (are those two Cs not portuguese?), this also matches with my phone's spanish keyboard too now! getting my practice in.

anyways, i am sat in a café and have been thinking about what the 4th dimension is, so after the TINIEST bit of googling, i have come up with two expert ideas, one is 4d euclidean and the other is also euclidean but i don't understand how they BOTH are euclidean lol.

one says that the 4th dimension is just like going 2d -> 3d, where we added the z-axis, so it'd be a new dimension that we can't see as 3d entities. this gif is used on the wikipedia but it kind of annoys me as it's described in a 2d fashion, but i could also literally make this in blender (a 3d tool)... but that's because we can't express it with only 3 dimensions, that's the point :/.

the other is related to einstein's theory of relativity or whatever, where he says the 4th dimension is [t] for event, otherwise known as time/spacetime as it's called, so then it's [x, y, z, t] for our 4 dimensional axes, this i prefer because it has led me to this next part:

do we not have 4d games already? we've had 2d games, which is just any game expressed on an [x, y] axis, it's most of the early era and STILL one of three major game dimensions (2d, 3d, A/VR (yes, i count those two separately!)).

3d is expressed on the [x, y, z] axis, A/VR is too, although expressed through physical movements rather than abstract/simulated movements (controller / keyboard / touch inputs), so i'd say it's expressed on the [real x, real y, real z] axis, but if you think about it, it is still all shown via 2d means, a screen!

now that i'm writing this and having made games in the past, i'm now realising that technically all of these mediums wouldn't function how we know if they didn't have a [t] dimension, because frames literally work off of time passing, 60/30/20 times per second, but that wasn't what i wanted to say in this blog, instead i want to talk about games that use time as a gameplay feature / absolute function of the system, like:

dōbutsu no mori (the original animal crossing game, n64)

pokémon gold / silver (the 2nd generation of pokémon games, gameboy)

these both had features that knew what time it was, and continually tracking it while their cartridge's battery was alive, THIS is the spacetime / [t] dimension that i'm interested in, and we've been playing with it since about the start of gaming too.

this post is still being made and i've got some interesting resources to look into, and things to think about!

➡️wiki page about time used in games
➡️post asking for games that use internally-tracked clocks

#018 autobrag [20/02/2024 21:45]

i've just had my first work placement talk in college today, it's weird how life's thought of as a bunch of big goals but you just sort of slowly transition between them and never appreciate the work you've done to get there.

i am currently making a first draft of a CV, something which i didn't imagine myself doing bc i thought i'd just waltz into a small indie studio and get a job, not how it works it seems. it's an odd process trying to sell yourself.

i don't really have experience in real fields, just hobbies to be interested in and projects to try and show said hobbies off: acoustics, music, languages, i guess all employers want are promises of interest? at the start anyways...

a lot of my classmates are understandably worried too, because in the gamedev field we won't have as many game-specific jobs, even a job like 3d modelling is tough enough to find in ireland, let alone someone wanting an intern!

a few of my friends said they were better off doing erasmus, where they go off and do a semester / project in a different country in a different-but-related course, so i could go to spain and do something like sound tech! exciting :D.

#017 exponential maths potential [26/01/2024 14:12]

i used to do higher level maths (3rd of 3 difficulties of maths) in junior cert, then i dropped down to ordinary level, mostly because of how the start of the leaving cert's maths course went, it started off with the binomial theorem and we had to do it all by hand, without much delving into how the formula wasn't fully broken down into small pieces, in other words i was being taught ineffectively...

finding and using standard deviations / whatever that part of maths is called + binomial theorem is what made me drop to ordinary, i never would've thought that after just a year of coding (in java mostly) would make me so much better at understanding how to read maths and break it down logically, i even think of the formulae in code format, because it just makes sense that way!

now i'm cruising through calculus so far, keeping up with my studies and actually trying to apply what i learn to my interest fields, mostly gamedev and music / acoustics.

i scraped through statistics in the first semester though, where i did standard deviations...

#016 back on the content grind?? [20/01/2024 00:15]

i'm currently editing a video for my gamedev channel and adding some cute little acnh music.

i've missed editing videos, especially when it's something easy like a talking head video, just going over my first videogame and showing off how it works (that's literally the video lol).

it's a shame that i've only started thinking about doing more content now, i'd rather work on gamedev videos and growing a coder viewership on yt and github rather than continuing with gameplay videos, i want to break games down, not just play them!

not saying that jakedaspud is dead... just on hiatus for now lol. until i want to stream getting platinum trophies again i guess!

also my outlook on content creation is very different this time around, more thinking about how my content can be made into many forms (long > short form) too, so i can recycle it efficiently and reach a larger audience.

i've even got a tiktok for my gamedev now, i'm getting better ;).

#015 the langlearnlist is here! [19/01/2024 00:50]

i am trying to improve my language learning game, so i've started a new project!

a common tactic in the polyglot community is using a set of templates in your native language (or a different target language if you're built... different) that you will translate into your new language, so you'll be learning a quickstart version of your language, the essentials to begin with!

i call it THE-L3 (github repo link): the language learning list. it's a set of templates (originally made in notion > markdown format > github markdown docs) in english, so i can translate them all to my current language!

#014 shoutout to me! [09/01/2024 22:12]

quick little update while i'm on my 5 minute maths study break!

happy new year! and also i've started a github document resource for learning music / guitar on my github here, right now it's just some links to useful sites and irish instrument websites, but it's gonna be much bigger as i get more serious about learning theory and learning how to share it with others!

this maths has been kicking my ass ngl, but at least i've been playing sudoku more, fun game, but i've lost my speed... go read my doc and keep engaging with my neocity, been getting lots of traffic recently! sick.

#013 it only took 2 family members :D [24/12/2023 19:58]

i have been on a roll with raffles this year, i'm just lucky like that??

today i was in the car coming home from getting food with the family, then i get a call that i won the monthly music minds guitar raffle!

we went home and then went straight into dublin to pick it up lol, the whole spiel didn't even take 2 hours, who would've thought dublin could be so empty on christmas eve??

the guitar i won is a burny les paul (vintage gold top colourway!) (RLG-80P ’24 VGT), it has the lowest action on any guitar i've played and it's slightly heavy, but you don't really notice it because of the size, it just feels right y'know?

the raffle goes on once every month, you pay €5 for a ticket and they call you at the end of the month to tell you! they also post a video of pulling your ticket, and your photo holding your prize! here's my video and photo :).

the guitar seems to be worth about €500+, which is my most expensive guitar yet! i'm also very in the green for buying it, because i've actually done the raffle 4 times over the months, so i've spent €20 and have gotten a €500+ guitar out of it!

also, [fernandes]: 🙄, [フェルナンデス], japan: 🤩

and my burny is made in china (MIC)...

#012 am i... wasting my time? [23/12/2023 14:12]

i am currently sat in a café working on my animation project (not fun).

and i am just thinking about my degree, what i am doing with my time nowadays, and how all of these modules are preventing me from doing what my course says it's for... making games.

the modules take too long and are too disorganised for efficient learning, i'm not making games like i thought i would, every part of the process is being broken up too small and progressing too slowly...

and the actual speedrun / platformer game i've been working on in MY NEW INDIE GAME STUDIO! has been put on the backburner because of these projects! >:(

i do this course and get paid from the grant system so that i have some safety and can "learn" how to do this, while getting that little bit of paper at the end. but at this point i think i'd become a better gamedev if i just stop it and pour everything into music / art and by making the games i could actually learn the practical skills faster AND have portfolio pieces to get on another dev team!

the safety prevents the pushing...

#011 official gamedev [27/10/2023 21:18]

11 is 3 in binary... and i've made my first actual game!

yesterday i presented my first game to my class, and that morning i also finished it lol

the game was made in unity, all of the assets: visuals and audio, were made by me, so i had only code things to reference (and that was done as comments INSIDE of the c# code!)

i made a top-down physics puzzle game with 2 levels (the second of which will just loop when you beat it lol), and with a few bugs / oversights, it has gone great! i am really proud of the game (and the name: robotation) and can see myself finishing / making it into a bigger demo to really show how it could be! i'll upload the college build and a demo build (when it's made! no promises :p).

also, now i can just sort of... make games.

weird feeling, here's the college build github repo.

#010 tell me dojomór / freev [21/10/2023 21:37]

today i went to my college campus... on a saturday (that's a first for me!)

now, i come in on fridays even though i don't have any classes, but this was very different! i barely saw anyone on the campus, in fact it was actually a bunch of normal people just doing their daily walks.

i came in because i volunteered for a coderdojo to teach a website daw called soundtrap to 3 different classes of kids! it was so much fun and VERY impulsive (thank you to ben once again for actually telling me about it, i was NOT going to check my email :p).

each class was *supposed* to be 45 minutes long, but each went for the full hour slot. the first class was a bit disorganised (because it sort of was lol), and after we signed into all of the slow computers, we realised that the monitors didn't output sound AND we couldn't get external speakers 🫠 (this is something we don't have to think about bc a lot of us use our laptops 24/7).

so eventually we just moved to a classroom with the alienware towers! those monitors thankfully had speakers so we could actually do the class!

there was a 45 minute video that we followed a bit for the first class, then realised that it wasn't fun so we just taught the class some basics of the program, then let them explore and ask for help if they needed it.

(^ this was a MUCH better approach, way more fun for everyone involved!)

i also won a free 43" tv!

i signed up for it during a careers day event, where companies send out a few reps to talk to the student population for future job opportunities.

can't imagine many people signed up, but it's still a big w for me!

#009 baby bird leaves the nest [19/08/2023 22:40]

i've just been broken up with today, for the first time, in my first relationship.

i can't say it was unexpected, we drifted apart really as she put it, it's weird how much i love to communicate clearly and concisely, then when it might have a long lasting consequence on me, i can't find the words i want.

it was a pretty long relationship i'd say, two and a half years, also there's no holidays or special days near this date, so we aren't hurting each other extra, any more than it needs to hurt.

i am currently in the darkness, only with a torch hanging onto my attic window and the light of my laptop screen, writing this into a .txt file because we've had a power cut the whole day, which apparently started 30 minutes after we went to bed last night. i will upload this tomorrow, i am also meeting a local game seller to buy a japanese PS1 set of 4 beat mania games and the controller, along with a special Super Street Fighter IV collector box game thing, exciting stuff i guess.

that "we" will be just "i" from now on, which is weird because even though it makes sense that we're done, and i am not to blame, it hurts just as much as if i had done everything wrong. this post is the sort of thing i'd "cringe" at if i saw another person post it, but i am doing this all the same, discovering how humans react even when they know what's coming, and what they're going to do in the future.

as for the future, i am going to write a list of what i care about, hobbies, values and then write goals for each, but i'll split up the list into measurable and unmeasurable goals, as people often care about relationships with friends, family, spouses, but can't really keep a specific person for their whole life. i'd then save it to a floppy disk because i haven't used my disk reader yet lol. i also lost my nana (mam's side) in may, 11 days before my birthday, and that actually didn't really hurt / make me sad, it felt surreal and still does sometimes. she is the closest person i've been to whom has died, and it felt alright losing her, not saying that i don't want her back, but we had a great time and we got to see her the day before she went, so it couldn't have ended better and realising how i felt alright after was a maturing moment, i felt good reminiscing about her instead of being sad she was gone.

it's weird and also not weird how the break up feels much worse than losing my nana, because although i love both of them, nana's passing was a definite end (physically), i don't get a choice in seeing her and talking to her again, we left things on a good note, which can never be changed. a break up between two people is just a social agreement, saying that we should stop spending so much energy on each other, stop doing these certain actions, whether in public or private, stop using this term with eachother, stop thinking about eachother, stop being a thing together. it hurts so much more because it's so easy to revert, it's not a definite end at all, and i will see her again for sure, we have connections and i miss her sorely, i would take her back in a heartbeat. i still want her as a friend, and i already miss talking to her, even though it hasn't even been 12 hours, also my phone is dead and i can't talk even if i wanted to. but she said that she won't want to even talk for a while, i don't want to lose her as a friend and it sucks to think about.

it hurts not to think that she isn't with me anymore, but that she might not get what she needs in the future, it's not my thing to think about, but she's still my friend and i want her to be okay, i don't want her to be mistreated or be sad, in a bad place. i hope everyone i know feels comfortable with me to where they can talk about anything.

also this post seems to be oversharing in my eyes, but i've never cared for being closed off, i don't care if people know a lot about me, it doesn't feel weird to me to write this and have it visible to others, who don't know me at all, i think of it as those random logs you find on people's corpses in fallout games, just a glimpse into what they are, and that's cool.

also it's not unprofessional in my eyes at all, what, you don't want me to make you a website because i was verbally sad about my first break up?

yeah right mate.

#008 my first comic con! [13/08/2023 22:48]

today i went to dublin comic con, it was my first one and the last time i was at this convention centre was when i was going to a jedward concert lol.

i spent a little over €100 and got mostly art prints, i went with a group of my sister's friends and her. we got there around 12:15 and left (surprisingly) when it closed around 17:00, but i wouldn't go back again.

i am mostly a gamer rather than an otaku, weeb, comic, or sci-fi person, and there was only one stall that even HAD games, let alone RETRO games (which is way more interesting to me), but the art was fun to look at, especially since i didn't order any "special" tickets that included the Q&As, panels, autographs and photos with celebrities (only one i knew was veronica taylor lol).

here's what i got:

6 A5 sized art prints, about €25 together i think.

a 3D printed Green Lantern ring, very cool! my sister got a skull one with it.

2 small cute holo stickers.

a green 20th anniversary kirby bag hanger, it's fluffy! also i mostly got it because: a. my girlfriend said i should get some bag hangers or something for back to college, and b. it was €5!!

and... now i'm realising most of what i spent was on my sister's stuff too hmmmm, ah well, she paid me most of that in the morning anyways.

#007 colores y simbolos [09/08/2023 21:37]

i started on my first research paper yesterday, it turns out i won't actually need to do a thesis / dissertation paper thing for year 4 of my degree, but it still interests me.

the current paper is based on symbols vs. colours in terms of how fast and how easily they can be identified, comparing between people with normal colour vision and people with colour vision deficiencies.

the papers aren't papers rn, they're just separate text files! hopefully if i finish some, i can print them out and feel them in my hands or something ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.

#006 the (jake)lab has opened [07/08/2023 02:49]

i have just created my second neocities site! it's for my research and articles about programming, language and accessibility research!

i link to it on the index page in the "friend sites" section, but it's actually me again!

i did copy and paste most of the html and css code, so i could quickly build the site, but i am trying to make it feel different by changing the size of elements, different font, different colours and positioning.

i had hoped to start writing up an accessibility study yesterday, but i think this was more useful (and fun :D).

i don't plan on having a blog on that site, so this is still where those updates'd go if i want to mention them, although there will be active logs on the site, so i guess that's just a web log, a... blog, oh.

it has already got over 100 visits before 100 updates! it's crazy to see how fast that went up compared to this site (for reference, this one's at 2,952 visits and 763 updates!)!

#005 monkey see, monkeytype / channel progress / yoyo yake [05/08/2023 23:59]

on the verge of a new day, with- oh yep it turned to 00:00, welp.

i've been really trying to get a better typing speed, both on keyboard and mobile now using monkeytype, currently i hover around 85wpm on keyboard and about 65-70~wpm on mobile, but today i was typing with freezing hands after waking up!

in the end, my typing speed will never actually affect my life that much, as long as i can type above average (40wpm!), then i can feel fine lol (also it's not like i am thinking about stuff to write at 80wpm).

on another note: my main yt channel jakedaspud has gotten 100,000 total views!

the channel has mostly gotten these views from shorts, but hey, i still value those views and know my expected / projected stats for those!

here's to another 100,000!

on anotherer note: i have started my yoyo hobby! went to an art n' hobby today and got a yellow €2.50 light up yoyo, i might start a new page for hobbies and progress, or not...

it was surprisingly hard to find a yoyo at ALL, even still i got the last yoyo in the store! i might go get a better one, or just stock up on a bunch of cheap ones... because i am blasting through this yoyo!

disregarding the fact that the first thing my sister did was throw it AT the ground (in a supermarket), thus enacting the first impact, i have hit the ground in a bad way at least 5 times since.

the yoyo is responsive and modified shape (ihni if these are the terms i am just trying my hardest to google), and lights up two red LEDs in one half when it spins.

also, the yoyo is SLOWLY breaking, the first fall makes it loose :s, second fall makes it a little better! :D, third fall makes it even LOOSER again :s, same pattern until it DIES!

#004 needed something to do... [04/08/2023 23:23]

23:23, crazy!

i have just reinstalled assassin's creed (01), not because i wanted to replay it, but because i haven't finished it!

i used to play it a lot on the ps3 when i was younger, i never actually left the first village really, although i do remember getting lost in the middle of the map with my horse! i only have 15 hours logged on the steam version, where i've actually been trying to beat it. since i have gotten a new laptop, i had to reinstall it and start from the beginning (yay not backing up to steam!).

andddd i needed something to resort to when i'm bored, sometimes it's coding, sometimes it's random roblox obbies, but those games just make me realise how empty and useless my time is now!

#003 bouncing priorities! [01/08/2023 22:11]

i have too many things i want to do: games to play, not playing them; art to make, not making it; videos to record AND edit, not allocating time!

i've even made a business card, i'm not sure when i'm going to get to give them out, i was thinking of doing some art selling with my sister (she's an artist and we're trying to get her to actually sell things smh :/) so maybe we could put one of mine and one of her's in a bag? i would most likely be there helping her when she's selling lol.

but the sprite sheet hasn't been going very well, i still haven't done any more art since i started it! i am currently trying to do more video content stuff instead, like streaming and youtube shorts.

#002 game ideas, ideas only [30/07/2023 18:03]

i WANT to make games, so i am deciding now that i will make a simple demo 2D platformer (pixel art ofc), with a level, a controllable character and a menu (menues are something i've never understood in how they're implemented).

it will not be good, it will not be fun, but it will finally make me feel like i'm moving towards the right direction (hopefully...).

#001 screw it, blog start [29/07/2023 02:21]

i just decided to start, i'm sick of this tab not having a place to go to!

i'm happy enough with how the neocity is growing, plenty of views when i update, a few while i'm gone, and 3 followers now! pretty neat.

i've just started an art project to try theming / have something to show on my finally, will i charge for it? probably not. will i set up a way to get paid? probably, although i am absolutely terrified of the tax system in the adult world, i really want to learn how to do my own taxes :)!

anyways, so far i have 3 of the 24 sprites i want, they are all going to be 8*8 sprites with a second frame of animation, so there'll technically be 48 sprites!

it's just typical rpg stuff right now, a death flame (for when an enemy dies!), a skeleton and of course, a slime!

i HAVE done a blog before, but i didn't have much motivation to do it because it was hosted on a replit site, not on a more social platform like neocities, so it was killed off for my peace of mind lol.

anyways, here's what i did today, went to dublin city and got a vinyl (the front bottoms, 10th anniversary picture disc of Talon of the Hawk) and two manga volumes (BnHA vol. 33 and PokéSupe vol. 28), i saw a lot of single Death Note volumes too, man are they beautiful!